Life is full of expectations. Expectations, that we have from life, from ourselves and from others. Then there are expectations that others have from us and to a great extent these expectations govern how our life shapes up.
The expectations are never constant either. If one does well, his expectations from himself, and also of others from him rise. Now, if one is able to handle such a situation well, he can use it to his advantage by using the expectations to keep himself motivated to perform even better. The danger here is that, if one fails to keep up to these expectations, he can feel really frustrated and, in extreme situations, even contemplate suicide. Society, as a whole, doesn’t help a person in dealing with such a situation either. If one does well, they are quick to give him a special treatment and place him on a high pedestal but at the first signs of failure he is plucked out from his high seat and thrown on the ground. Once down it is really hard, if not impossible, to get back up. But, true courage lies in getting up when everyone has thought of you as down and out.
Another funny thing is that the better a person you become, the better people want you to be. What would pass off as normal behavior for others becomes a major crime for you. A dirty sheet will hide the little stains and the focus will only be on the really bad ones, while a clean sheet will become spoiled even with the slightest stains. A similar analogy can be applied to people too. If you have been good, you just have to get better.
What is to be done then? Is there no way we can make others happy and be happy ourselves too? There is a way and the way lies through the fields of satisfaction. It is always a good idea to live in the present and enjoy what you have. Things can always be better, but they could be worse too. So, there is no reason to rue what is not, but live what is, because that is the reality. If you are satisfied with your present, most likely others will be satisfied with you too. Finally, looking into the future, and learning from the past is important, but not as important as living the today because your tomorrow depends on it.
The expectations are never constant either. If one does well, his expectations from himself, and also of others from him rise. Now, if one is able to handle such a situation well, he can use it to his advantage by using the expectations to keep himself motivated to perform even better. The danger here is that, if one fails to keep up to these expectations, he can feel really frustrated and, in extreme situations, even contemplate suicide. Society, as a whole, doesn’t help a person in dealing with such a situation either. If one does well, they are quick to give him a special treatment and place him on a high pedestal but at the first signs of failure he is plucked out from his high seat and thrown on the ground. Once down it is really hard, if not impossible, to get back up. But, true courage lies in getting up when everyone has thought of you as down and out.
Another funny thing is that the better a person you become, the better people want you to be. What would pass off as normal behavior for others becomes a major crime for you. A dirty sheet will hide the little stains and the focus will only be on the really bad ones, while a clean sheet will become spoiled even with the slightest stains. A similar analogy can be applied to people too. If you have been good, you just have to get better.
What is to be done then? Is there no way we can make others happy and be happy ourselves too? There is a way and the way lies through the fields of satisfaction. It is always a good idea to live in the present and enjoy what you have. Things can always be better, but they could be worse too. So, there is no reason to rue what is not, but live what is, because that is the reality. If you are satisfied with your present, most likely others will be satisfied with you too. Finally, looking into the future, and learning from the past is important, but not as important as living the today because your tomorrow depends on it.
9 comments:
Hey man!
I am sorry that u only had 4 unique clicks as my tenant. I should have pimp your blog more since I think your blog is an excellent read.
If you want I can return your credits. I shall be adding your blog to my blogroll!
I totally agree with this entry! Where do you get your inspriation to write? You read a lot?
I am not sure if I agree with you entirely here.
It is one thing to be unhappy but quite another to want to better yourself. We are put on this earth to better ourself, to work of Karma.
Regarding expectations, I think in general people mostly expect too little of themselves or they do it in areas that are of no great consequence. How important is it in the grand picture that you were this "hot shot banker" or excelled at any one subject if you, yourselves are not a good person?
Good people. What are they? There is not a being on earth that can truly (or could ever) say they were truly good. We are all flawed. We are all selfish, even the most selfless person is selfish in perspective. Isn't it rather true, that selflessness merely hides a persons dislike for themselves? Isn't it a way to "give up" ourselves and just concentrate on others rather than really looking in the mirror to see our own imperfections. Is it not just a form of self-abandonment?
To come back to making ourselves and others happy.
We can not make another person happy! If they are not happy, if they do not love themselves enough, there is nothing we can do. Sure, we might make someone laugh, but what is happiness?
Happiness is truly accepting who we are, with all the horrible truths about our inner selfs, all the imperfections, all the flaws, all the lies we tell ourselves.
Accepting it and still love ourselves. And loving ourselves enough to be honest, honest enough to want to find out who we really are, not who we might want to be, pretend or think we are.
Then, and only then can we truly become good, happy people.
Oh and one more thing:
No ones sheet is white enough to have the right to judge!
To be offended maybe, but not to criticize and think ourselves better!
Expectations is an outsiders perspective and goals are insiders. I will never think, I expect XYZ out of my life, rather I willll say I want/have to do this or achieve XYZ. I have some goal and others Expect me to do something else then, i am in a pathetic condition in their eyes, but for me my goals matter! What say
expectations itself are based on perceptions
"But, true courage lies in getting up when everyone has thought of you as down and out."
I like that line
fields of satisfaction... mmm...
i go with the idea of having balance. that everyone lies (house MD!). but lies have some truth. to reward ourselves for our accomplishements. and to continue always looking forward for success.
Noi: Thanks for having my blog as your renter and adding it to your blog roll,and, of course, I do not want my credits back.
Ummm, I really dont have any one source of inspiration other than just enjoying writing.There was a time when I used to read a lot but sadly now I don't have enough time to do that.
Jeanine: Bettering ourselves should not come at the cost of happiness, which essentially involves accepting what you are and taking it to the next level from there.
And, I would agree with most of what you said.
The Chef: You are right but with goal setting comes the expectation of acheiving the goal.
You will say that you want/have to do this, but this thing will depend on what you expect from life and what you expect your capabilities to be. No?
Stev True. We should always look forward to achieve whatever we set out for.
You can never please all of the people all the time. :)
You have an interesting blog and I thought I'd just say hi since I was here.
At the end of the day humanity is so frail like dead leaves waiting for a gust of wind to blow us away.If you have ever stood in the middle of a desert or deep in a jungle you realize how insignificant you are in the grand scheme of things.To expect is to be arogant,we should accept that the greatest gift is our life and be thankfull for that.
Rashenbo: That is so true.
Thanks for visiting the blog and leaving a comment.
Cooltopten: I would totally agree with that.
My BYB post is up: http://advertising-for-success.blogspot.com/
2007/01/blog-your-blessing-sunday-gandhi.html
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