January 11, 2010

BYBS: Getting Hurt!

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One of the last things that I thought I could be thankful for was getting hurt. There are times when someone says something, and you can't help but feel offended. Sometimes, you react immediately and tell the other person how you felt about what he, or she, said. At other times, you stay quiet but make a mental note of avoiding the other person as much as you can.

Something similar happened to me recently.

I was talking to a friend on the phone, and she said something that I thought was hurtful. I did not say much at the moment, though I did drop a hint about feeling hurt by what she said. I realised, however, that she had no idea about what it was that she had said to hurt me. In fact whatever she had said was in a matter of fact way, with no intention of being offensive. So, I tried to forget it, and let it go at that.

Later, however, I was thinking if I should have something to her, and I realised something. There must have been times when I must have hurt people without realising what I was doing. I like to believe that I am a frank person who doesn't mince words in telling people what he thinks about things. In my frankness, I am sure I must have said things to people which might have hurt them. Had I ever apologised for that? I don't think so.

By being hurt the other day, therefore, I realised two things:

1. Sometimes people don't mean to hurt you even if they eventually do. Before you form an opinion about them, you have to think carefully about whether they were meaning to be hurtful, or whether they said something that they believed was in your best interests.

2. Sometimes we say things that we believe are in the best interests of other people, but these things might actually hurt others, and they may even decide to stop being our friend.The solution lies not in hiding things, but in choosing your words carefully to ensure that the other person involved understands that you have his, or her, best interests at heart.
Have a great week ahead!


Unknown said...

Well said Mr. Writer......
But do u think its really important to weigh and choose your words before you talk to your frnz.Well if we begin to fear the opinion of others(Frnz) we shall hesitate to speak the truth that lies in us........

SandyCarlson said...

I have had friends who have forgiven my mistakes of this nature or have ignored my blunder. I'm grateful for that.

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